From Trauma to Truth
- Traci P Cook
- Jun 22
- 3 min read
From trauma to truth, A Love Supreme
Where is …
The girl who was bullied
By the girls who were bullies and the boys who were hurt and confused
Who was told she thought she was cute and knew she was smart
Body shamed — too skinny, too curvy, flat chested, big chested
Too short or too tall
The nerdy girl
The fast girl
The preacher’s daughter
The sinner’s whore
The girl who was abused looking for love
Who lived with the anguish and shame of her mother and her mother’s mother’s mother and of the all her aunties except that one
Who everybody called a Jezebel but who they secretly wished that they could become
The girl who dreamed big and stayed small
The girl who performed for praise and reward but never felt loved
The girl who found a big God that others wanted to make small
The girl whose niceness was taken as weakness and whose desire to be a soft feminine being was taken too soon
And left her with a hardened heart
A baby around her belly
Mouths to feed
And a man who she had to make feel loved
Where is the girl who said she didn’t need nobody but ached inside
Where is the girl who was
Placed in a box wrapped with ribbon and lace and a bow, instead of tattoos and piercings or covered with cute pinafore dresses instead of tux and tails
The girl who wished upon a star and wanted rainbows and happily ever afters
The girl whose loud imaginative spirit was trapped by conventions and traditions and rituals and rules
The girl who sacrificed for love until she lost her voice, her direction and her desire
The girl who needed to be mothered not smothered and not tethered to false beliefs
The girl who lost her way on the road to womanhood
But is finally ready to return to be reborn
To return to her bully’s home address
…the playground, the sandbox, the neighborhood, the church, the corner or the club, the boardroom or the bedroom, at her momma’s knee, her momma’s-baby-daddy’s-maybe fearful space of pain, or the uncle’s glance or the other secret touch of shame,
Ready to return now
and finally face the bullies who whispered, stared, poked and prodded to keep her in check
Who were themselves hurt but rather hide behind their own fears and beat her down with their pain
Where is …
The girl who can finally let the girl she was born to be come out and meet the woman she has became
Meet her and love her
Forgive her and set her free
To dance in the rain
Naked and alone
And filled with the joy of her own soul’s salvation
Knitted as she was intended to be before she entered her mother’s womb
She is rebirthed
Realizing and reclaiming and remembering her divine divinity her divine destiny
Weird
Nerdy
Beautiful
A mosaic of colorful complexity
Brilliant and Bold
Quiet and demure
Sensual, sexual and spiritual
Godly and unashamed
She can step up
Shoulders squared, standing strong
She can tell the bullies — step aside
As she assumes her rightful place
On her throne
Not looking to return wrongs
Or avenge hurts with equal wrath
Rather entering a space with tender tenacity and ferocious faith
Enough to believe that love is still the answer
But no longer willing to bear the bully’s burdens
She can now break the cycle and begin the healing that she needs
To Rewrite and rebuild
Unlearn and reteach
And walk uprightly as she stands confident and sways with rhythmic ease
For she now knows she is a divine vessel
The source of life
Meant to honor and
Pamper and protect herself first
So she can in turn
Honor and pamper and serve her children, her lover, her life and her passions as she leads
Never forsaking her own pleasure for the sake of pleasing others
Only then
Can she release the darkness of the past and walk into her future
Ready to live in the fullness of her light
Ready to become and live the truest version of herself
Wrapped in
A love that reigns supreme
*Title inspired by Coltrane’s, “A Love Supreme”
#femininity #womanhood #sensuality #self-acceptance #self-awareness #soul #liberation #self-expression
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